Nisful Imaan aims to bring together single Muslim males & females that are sincerely looking to get married. The duty of every Muslim is to be a guardian unto each other, to enjoin good and forbid evil.

If you are married, kindly forward this invitation to unmarried friends.

After a successful pilot event and due to great demand, Nisful Imaan will be hosting its third marriage event insha’Allah. It’s an opportunity for single Muslim males and females to meet potential suitors in a safe Islamic environment.

If you are interested send an email to nisfulimaan@gmail.com

You will then be contacted regarding payment (R100) and securing a seat
Date : 13 March 2011
Place: JHB (venue will be disclosed on confirmation of your attendance to maintain privacy)
please email nisfulimaan@gmail.com for full information.

Subhanallah, this will bring tears. A must for all married brothers. I can only beg of Allah to put this level of love of ones wife & love for Islam in our hearts.

Youtube video below, if it doesnt play. I have pasted a transcription below.

Dedicated to my Princess

You never complained when you knew we would have nothing.
You were content on having what little you needed.

Where others would have left or moaned you never once let out a sigh.
You understood what was written was what we would eat.

I never once complained about what was put in front of me
as I knew it was your hands that brought it to me.

When I had nothing I had you.
We smiled as we saw the destruction around us
knowing that these people were not true.

You never felt sympathy towards the enemy.
You put your trust in your Rubb
and in turn you followed me.
Never did I have to wonder about you
as my secrets, my honour and my Deen
were safe with you.

We both know what hardships you faced just by being with me,
but not a word did you speak.
You were strong and in turn you made me strong.

Like a vanguard for this Ummah you concealed yourself.
Where others would rush to please their desires,
you were the essence of Taqwa.

Life was easy with you it came so naturally.
You were the extension of me and
would never need to finish my words as who knew me better than you?
You knew your place, which was by my side.

It’s the little things that make the person
and you would have easily have kept me going for a lifetime.

The way you would look at me with fire in your eyes
showed me that I was the only one for you.
You stole my heart and hid it away.
I loved your jealousy.
I loved to tease you with the thought of others
just so I could know how dear I was to you.

What chance did shaytan have
when you would ensure that fajr was the easiest of the salahs.
I loved that you would forsake me in an instant to fast a voluntary fast.
I loved that the Haq was dearer to you than my life and those of our jewels

Watching you makes me laugh
as I wonder if my heart will ever want another
as I watch you feed my child,
as you lift her out of the bath,
as you wipe her little nose and the face she pulls.

You will never find a diamond in the hands of the poor
in the same way our diamond deserves to be carried in your hands.
We could have it all my love
but who sells Paradise for an hour of passing pleasure?
Not us.
I chose you Umm ***** as I know our fruits are safe with you.
Never would I have to worry about where the loyalties of my babies are.

They will love what we love they will love Allah Most Glorified Most High,
they will Love the Prophets and the best of Companions,
They will love those who they have never met but will long to meet.
They will love those better then us.
They will live to honour one statement.
La illaha illallah Muhammadur RasoolAllah
Others will fall under the weight of it but not them.
Their hearts will beat it, their words testify to it and their hands carry it.

Dont think I left you.
Dont think that in this world anything is dearer to me
then the minute that I walk home
knowing what waits for me behind closed doors.

I went to find a better place for us. I went to fulfil the best of deals.
I saw it written that if you give your life then eternity will be ours.

I saw it written somewhere that this was all a test
and I have no doubt that one who promises us
and whose word is truth must love me very much
as he gave me you and you were the hardest thing to give up.

They say the mind cannot comprehend what awaits us,
that sadness will be forgotten,
and they say that the eye has yet to see
and the ear has yet to hear the beauties that await us
in our new home.

They say rivers of honey my love
they say rivers of milk they say rivers of wine.
They say pearls and Gold thrones ,
they say musk and cool breezes.

Is it not fitting that I go to see this land afar to take you and our children?
I fear that the gates of opportunity will close behind me my love.
I fear others will hear what I hear and rush there and I will have nothing to offer you.

I know you will send our sons to look for their father.
Tell them that they will find me in every battle,
in every fight where the black flag is flown.

Tell them that the pain will be a pinch and then they will see what I see.
Tell them Green Birds wish to meet them.
Tell the Angels will call them by the best of names
and most of all that Allah The One The Eternal will be pleased with them.

I told you once that only 2 things will have me. You and death.

My life was with you but now I must marry again.
I must marry what was promised to me the moment I was born.
I must marry my fate and in turn I must marry death.

After death will come reckoning and if I stand with the best of creation
I will with the permission of Allah Lord of the Heavens and the Earth beg for you.

None was worthy to stand next to me in this life
so why is it I should desire another in the next?

Earlier this week our office printer started acting up, called the printing company who sent through their technician to fix everything up.

As he was working with the printer, we’re making idle chitchat about business, politics, the zuma stuff etc. He notices a few elderly folk (some friends of ours) dressed in Islamic garb and jokes that they must be the big bosses. I humor him by saying yes, and this is how our conversation went.

Technician: You indians are always very united eh, always hiring your own type & looking after your communities

Me: Yeah you could say that, but it’s more the Muslims – not all indians are Muslims and not all Muslims are indians
Technician: how so?

Me: We as Muslims look out for one another no matter what color skin they are.

Technician: I see, also your families – you guys live with your parents even when you grow up and its totaly normal! Also when you get married you still stay with them

Me: Ya we do, its for the free food! – na seriously as Muslims its our duty to look after our parents.

Technician: But after you’re married you can move out and stay on your own

Me: Yes you can, but in our religion we are taught that they key to paradise lies under our mothers feet. So we MUST look after our parents no matter what because we can do all the good in the world but if our parents aren’t happy  and taken care of then our God is not happy and that means no entry paradise for us.

Technician: Yeah i get what you are saying, in Islam the women can have more then one husband right?

Me: No no no – the man can have more then one, up to 4 wives.

Technician: Ya us Christians too, my father back home has 3 wives

Me: Ya but does he treat them all equally?

Technician: How do you mean?

Me: Well if you have 4 wives, and you buy one a car, then you have to buy all the other 3 a car too. If you buy a house for one, then the same house or same value house to be bought for the others!

Technician: eish (wow) thats going to be quite expensive!

Me: Also your time must be spent equally, one night with each one.

Technician: But what if the one night the wife is having her period, then what?

Me: well you don’t have to ‘sleep’ with her, you can just spend time or if she wants, she can allow you to spend the night with another wife

*note: I’m not sure of the sharia ruling of this, but i did recall the hadith when Sauda the wife of our prophet gave up her night so he could spend it with Aiysha if i’m not mistaken*

Technician: So Islam is very similar to Christianity

Me: Yes, very similar – we also believe in Jesus

Technician: Jesus too!? but you dont believe he is the son of God right?

Me: Correct, we say he is a prophet – but our prophet Mohammed is the final prophet

Technician: So what about Jesus

Me: Jesus was a prophet before Mohammed but he did not die, he will return to the world one more time – don’t you guys believe this too? – Anyway when he returns he will be a follower of our Prophet.

Technician: That’s interesting

*we continue talk a bit more about arb stuff on learning Arabic, work, printers etc.

As he leaves, he asks “How much does an English Quraan cost?”
I say I’ll bring one tomorow to work and he can have it at no cost.

The next day he popped by the office to collect an english copy I received at a Yusuf Estes dinner.

This one had me in tears,  imagine an Ummah where our mothers had this level of Imaan and where our sons were this brave & fearless.

It is mentioned that one of the righteous women in Basra was Umm Ibrahim al Hashimeeyah. The enemy attacked one of the Muslim towns so people were encouraged to join jihad. Abdul Wahid bin Zayd al Basri delivered a speech encouraging jihad and among the audience was Umm Ibrahim. Among the things Abdul Wahid talked about was al Hoor (the women of Paradise). Umm Ibrahim stood up and said to Abdul Wahid: “You know my son Ibrahim and you know that the nobility of al Basra wish to have him marry one of their daughters and I have not agreed to one of them yet. But I like this girl you described and I would be happy to marry her to my son. Can you please describe her again?”

Abdul Wahid then narrated a poem in the description of the Hoor. Umm Ibrahim said: “I want my son to marry this girl and I would pay you 10,000 dinars as her dowry and you take him with you in this army. He might die as a Shaheed and intercede for me on the Day of Judgment.” Abdul Wahid said: “If you do so, that is great success for you and your son.” She then called her son from the audience. He stood up and said: “Yes my mother!” She said: “Are you pleased to marry this girl with the condition of giving your soul to Allah?” He said: “Yes! I am very pleased!” She said: “O Allah you are my witness that I have married my son to this girl from Paradise with the condition he spends his soul in your sake” Then she went and brought back with her 10,000 dinars and gave it to Abdul Wahid and said: “This is her dowry. Take it and use it to provide for the mujahideen” She then purchased for her son a good horse and she armed him. When the army started its march Ibrahim came out with the reciters of Quran surrounding him and reciting:
“Indeed, Allah has purchased from the believers their lives and their properties [in exchange] for that they will have Paradise.”

When Umm Ibrahim was greeting her son she told him: “Be careful and don’t allow any shortcomings from yourself to be seen by Allah” She them embraced him and kissed him and said: “May Allah never bring us together except on the Day of Judgment!”

Abdul Wahid said: “When we reached the enemy’s territory and people were called to fight. Ibrahim was in the front and he killed many of the enemy but then they overwhelmed him and killed him. On our way back I told my soldiers not to tell Umm Ibrahim that her son was killed until I tell her. When we entered al Basra she met me and said: “Did Allah accept my gift so I can celebrate or was it rejected so I should cry?” I said: “Allah did accept your gift and your son died as a Shaheed” She then prostrated to thank Allah and said: “Thank you Allah for accepting my gift” The following day she came to me in the mosque and said: “Rejoice!” I said: “What good news do you have?” She said: “I saw my son Ibrahim last night in a dream. He was in a beautiful garden dressed in green clothes, sitting on a throne made of pearl and he had a crown on his head. He told me: “Rejoice my mother! I got married to my bride!”

Taken from: Mashari Al-Ashwaq Ila Masari Al-Ushaaq Wa Mutheer Al-Gharaam Ila Daar Assalaam
THE BOOK OF JIHAD
By Abi Zakaryya Al Dimashqi Al Dumyati “Ibn-Nuhaas”
(D. 814 Hijri) Translated By Noor Yamani (Abridged)
Revised –Abu Rauda

As she stands at the doorway,
I bid my farewell.

After exiting the door,
I pause and glance over my shoulder.

As I watch with a spark in my eyes,
Her eyes start to trickle down to the floor.

Patiently standing,
I could sense the love emanating from her.

Gently, I turn to her,
“Sweetheart,
Do not look towards the East or the West,
Nor look at our photo albums which bring joy to the chest,
Nor look towards the calls of Satan lest he seduces you,
But look towards the sky and ask.

Ask Ar-Raheem for my success,
So that I may meet you with a scent of musk that is full of excitement.”

Her eyes trickle back to my eyes;
Captured… caught in the moment of reality are we.

She smiles at me and whispers,
“Your love is awaiting you… so when weak or in doubt,
Don’t look East, nor look West,
But look to the Heavens and ask…”

A silence befalls us as my heart listens attentively.

“Ask your Beloved to allow for you to meet Him with a bright face on that Day…
The Day where I meet you with musk emanating from my body.”

My heart drops and I look at her with surprise.
Before I could speak,
She puts her finger on my lips and tells me to quiet.

And as her tears fall from her sweet eyes,
I only look on in shock.
The woman who I am leaving for the sake of Allah,
Is now the woman who is leaving me for the sake of Allah.

“Go” she tells me.
“Don’t look back.”

I slowly walk backwards,
Staring her down,
Remembering her for the last time.

I turn around and rush for my horse,
Jump upon it and ride with the wind,
Throwing the thoughts of my wife behind.

And here today,
I sit upon this mountain,
Writing about my wife,
Looking upon the beautiful horizon,
Forgetting the advice of my wife.

So I ask and I ask until I can ask no more.

My Commander taps my shoulder,
“You are leading the night mission,
So go… go in the name of Allah.”

Night falls and I stare at the base of the disbelievers,
Reminding the fighters of our plans,
When all of a sudden,
A person on a horse rushes down the mountain opposite of us,
Towards the base.

We all watch in shock and disbelief.
The rider somehow penetrates the base,
As if the Angels blinded the disbelievers,
Cutting off their heads, one by one,
Blood spilling everywhere.

I use the binoculars for a better vision,
And I see that this rider turns towards me,
As if knowing that I’m looking with a spark in my eyes,
The rider is then ambushed from behind,
Thrown off the horse,
And stabbed to death.

A light then immediately emanates from the riders body,
Straight to the heavens.
And a burst of the musk scent is echoed in the valley.

We all rush down to the base,
Kill the remaining disbelievers,
And proceed to the dead rider.

I rush to the body,
Unwrap the turban,
And faint with tears in my eyes.

 

Is it allowed for us to delay having children?”

The Answer Dr. Yusuf al-Qaradawi:

“Yes, this is allowed and there is nothing wrong with that. However, one is not allowed to permanently delay having children as this goes against the objectives of marriage, even if it is a personal choice.”

Footnotes added by Suhaib Webb:

1. There should be a joint agreement amongst spouses when taking such as decision

2. One is allowed to permanently delay having children if there is a reasonable [qualified medical] suspicion that the mother could be harmed by giving birth. For example a women has had a number of caesarean births and her doctors have informed her that any more would lead to reasonable harm to her person.

www.suhaibwebb.com

There are three types of divorce in Islam:

1. Talaaqur Raj’ee (revocable divorce)
2. Talaaqul Baa’in (irrevocable divorce)
3. Talaaqul Mughallazah (permanently irrevocable divorce)

1. Talaaqur Raj’ee

Talaaqur Raj’ee is that type of divorce where the husband divorces his wife in clear and explicit terms. For example, he says “I divorce you”, or “You are divorced”. Once the husband utters such words, the wife becomes divorced and she has to sit in Iddah (waiting period). The iddah will be three menstrual cycles if she experiences menses, three months if she does not experience menses or at child birth if she is pregnant. The husband now has the choice of revoking his divorce before the expiry of the Iddah period. The husband may revoke his divorce by verbally expressing his desire to take her back into his nikaah or by having physical contact with her by way of kissing, fondling, touching her with passion or having intercourse with her. If the husband does not revoke the divorce during the Iddah period, the divorce becomes irrevocable. Now, if he wishes to take her back (ie after the Iddah period has lapsed), he can only do so by peforming a new Nikah.

2. Talaaqul Baa’in

Talaaqul Baa’in is an irrevocable divorce where the husband uses ambiguous or vague words to divorce his wife. In other words, he uses such words which could mean divorce or which could also mean something else. For example, the husband tells his wife “Pack your bags and get out” or “You are no more my wife” or “Go to your father’s house”. In all these cases where vague words are used, Talaaqul Baa’in will only take place if the husband has the intention of divorce at the time of uttering these wolds. If he merely uttered these words out of anger or he had some other meaning besides divorce in mind, divorce will not take place. Once the husband has issued one or two Talaaqul Baa’in, the nikaah has been broken and she has to sit in Iddah. If the husband wishes to take back his wife, a new Nikaah will have to be performed.

3. Talaaqul Mughallazah

Talaaqul Mughallazah is when the husband issues three divorces to his wife. Once the husband issues his wife with three divorces (Talaaqur Raj’ee or Talaaqul Baa’in), their nikaah is completely broken. She cannot marry him until Halaalah has taken place. Halaalah is a process wherin the wife completes her Iddah, thereafter she marries another man and consummates her marriage with him. The second husband then divorces her or passes away. She again has to observe her Iddah from this second marriage. After this, she may again marry her first husband.

And Allah knows best.

Desirable Acts

* It is a desirable Sunnah that the groom puts his hand on the bride’s head and pray for her. The Prophet (SAW) taught us to say:

“O Allah, I ask You her goodness, and the goodness of the inborn dispositions which You have given her, and I solicit Your protection from her evil, and the evil of the inborn dispositions which You have given her.” (Related by Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah).

The groom may make this supplication aloud or silently.

* It is desirable that they pray two rakat together (bride behind groom), and then make a supplication after the prayer. The Prophet (SAW) said:

“Verily, affection is from Allah and repugnance is from Satan who wants you to hate what Allah has allowed to you. So when your wife comes to you, ask her to pray two rakat behind you, and then say: ‘O Allah, bless my wife for me, and bless me for her. O Allah, unite between us in good, and if You separate us, separate us in good.’” (Related by Abu Shaybah)

* The groom is encouraged to please his bride and treat her with kindness. It is a Sunnah that he presents to her something to drink or eat. Asma Bint Yazeed (RA) said:

“I adorned Aisha (RA) for her wedding night, so the Prophet (SAW) came to her side and brought a big cup of milk from which he drank and then presented it to her, but she blushed and lowered her head.” (Related by Ahmad)

* It is permissible that they take off all their clothes and be completely naked, but it is better for them to be under a common sheet, for the Prophet (SAW) said:

“Verily Allah is modest and discreet and He likes modesty and discretion.” (Related by Ahmad, Al-Tirmidhi, and Abu Dawud)

* The couple is encourage to engage in foreplay before having intercourse. The Prophet (SAW) said:

“One of you should not fall upon his wife like the animal does, let there be a messenger between them.’ He was asked: ‘And what is the messenger?’ He said: ‘Kissing and talking.’” (Related by Al-Daylami)

This indicates that the man should seek to satisfy his wife’s desires as she satisfies his.

* Before starting intercourse, it is a Sunnah to make the following supplication:

“In the name of Allah, O Allah, keep Satan away from us, and keep Satan away from that (the offspring) which You grant us.”  (Related by Al-Bukhari)

* They are free to have intercourse in any position (in the vagina) they wish, as Allah (SWT) says:

“Your wives are as a tilth for you, so go to your tilth (have sexual relations with your wives in any manner as long as it is in the vagina and not in the anus) when or how you will…” (Al-Baqarah 2:223)

* They are free to have intercourse anytime they wish, but moderation is advised and sexual activity should not become an obsession as it may take over other activities of life. Having intercourse on the night before Friday is desirable as the Prophet (SAW) said:

“Whoever makes ghusl on Friday to clean himself from janabah (impurity due to having intercourse), then left for prayer, it is as if he offered a camel in sacrifice.” (Related by Al-Bukhari)

* After intercourse, it is desired that they take a bath (ghusl) before going to sleep. If this presents a hardship on them, they should perform ablution and can postpone ghusl until before Fajr prayer. If they want to have intercourse a second time, it is desirable that the man performs ablution first, as the Prophet (SAW) said:

“If one of you had intercourse with his wife and then wants to come to her again, it is better for him to perform ablution, for it gives him vigor to come again.” (Related by Muslim)

As muslims, we pretty much know the whole procedure for Nikah (marriage) – The whole process from ones parents getting permission, the dowry, witnesses, signing of the contract, etc etc.

That said, with the many clickthroughs through Amatomu.com, I’m certain that many non-muslims could and would be reading this site. I’m sure the article below would give a good overview of a shariah approved Nikah.

This is sourced from IslamOnline.net

All praise is due to Allah, the Creator of our world and the laws that govern it. And peace and blessings of Allah be upon His slave and final Messenger Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), the one sent to all of mankind, the one sent to guide people out from the darkness of shirk (polytheism), into the light of tawheed (montheism).

Know, dear reader, that Allah Most High has created things in pairs. Those pairs must get together in certain ways in order for reproduction to occur. The way for reproduction to occur among humans—males and females—is through marriage, known in Arabic as nikah. Islam urges Muslims to marry and prohibits premarital relationships. Allah Most High says in the Qur’an:

[And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-Giving, Knowing.](An-Nur 24:32)

Also, Allah’s Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him), in the hadith found in Al-Bukhari and Muslim, commanded young people to marry, and advised those of them who could not afford it to fast as a means of controlling their sexual desire. From an Islamic perspective, marriage is not viewed merely as a means of satisfying natural desires and passions. Its goals are much deeper than just obtaining legal sex. Allah Most High points out one of the main objectives behind marriage by saying

[And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you might live with tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts (hearts).] (Ar-Rum 30:21)

The marriage contract is the formal bond that turns two individuals from strangers to husband and wife. It is the most important contract that most people execute throughout their lives. Since the marriage contract has such great significance, the deen of Islam provides a number of guidelines. Before delving into the basic elements of marriage, it is worth mentioning here that marriage is a serious matter and should be dealt with seriously. It is not allowed for a man to marry and then claim he did not really mean it, or that he was joking. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “There are three matters in which it is not permissible to joke: marriage, divorce, and emancipation (of slaves)” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).

The Islamic marriage contract has conditions, requirements, pillars, and optional elements. A contract must be Islamically acceptable.

Eligibility of Bride and Groom:
The first of these conditions is that both the bride and groom must fulfill certain requirements. The groom must be a chaste Muslim having attained the age of puberty. He must not be related to the bride by any of the permanently prohibiting blood, milk, or marital relationships such as his sisters, paternal and maternal aunts, daughters, granddaughters, and others. He must not be prohibited from marrying the bride for any of the temporary reasons stipulated in the Qur’an and Sunnah. An example of a temporary reason is that as long as a man is married to a particular woman, all of her sisters become temporarily prohibited for him; that is, he may not marry any of them unless he divorces their sister or she dies. Others who are temporarily prohibited in marriage include a woman who is married to another man; a woman and simultaneously her niece; an adulteress or prostitute that has not sincerely repented; and others that the Islamic Shari`ah may have listed.

The requirements a bride must fulfill is that she must be a chaste Muslim, Christian, or Jew. She must not be married to another man, and must not be related to the groom by any of the permanently prohibiting blood, milk, or marital relationships, in addition to not being prohibited from marrying the groom for any of the temporary reasons as stated above.

Bride’s Permission:
The next required element of the marriage contract is the bride’s permission. Without her permission, the contract is either null and void, or may be invalidated by the Islamic authorities at the bride’s request. The minimum required permission may be done by either voicing her approval or through a passive expression such as remaining silent when asked about a potential husband and simply nodding her head, or making any other motion to indicate that she does not object to the marriage. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “A deflowered unmarried woman (i.e., widow or divorcee) may not be married without her instructions; and a virgin may not be married without her permission, and her silence indicates her consent” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).

The Woman’s Wali:
The next requirement for a valid contract is the approval of the woman’s guardian known as the wali. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “A marriage (contract) is not valid without a wali” (Abu Dawud, At-Tirmidhi, and others; verified to be authentic by Al-Albani). Normally, a woman’s wali is her father. If for any reason her father is unable to be her wali, her wali would then be her next closest blood relation: the grandfather, uncle, brother, son, and so on. It is not permissible for a woman to take another woman as her wali. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “A woman may not give another woman in marriage, nor may a woman give herself (independently) in marriage” (Ibn Majah, Al-Bayhaqi and others; verified to be authentic by Al-Albani).

If the bride does not have a Muslim blood relative as a wali, the Islamic authority, represented by the ruler or judge, would appoint a wali for her. In non-Muslim communities the local imam is the one to be appointed as the wali of a woman who has no wali. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “A marriage (contract) is not valid without a wali” (Ahmad and Abu Dawud; verified to be authentic by Al-Albani). (See The Wali in Marriage: Role and Responsibilities.) The presence of the wali or a representative he has appointed is an integral element of the contract or else the contract is deemed invalid. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Whichever woman marries without her wali’s permission, her marriage is void, her marriage is void, her marriage is void. If he (the husband) performs intercourse with her, the mahr (dower) becomes her right because he had access to her private parts” (Ahmad and Abu Dawud; verified to be authentic by Al-Albani).

The Witnesses:
Another condition for the validity of a marriage contract is the presence of at least two trustworthy Muslim male witnesses. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “A marriage is not valid without a wali and two trustworthy witnesses” (Ahmad, Ibn Hibban, and others; authentic according to Al-Albani).

The Mahr (Dower):
The next element of the marriage contract is a mandatory marriage gift from the husband to his wife. In Arabic, this gift is called mahr or sadaq. Allah Most High said, [And give the women their dowry as a free gift] (An-Nisaa’ 4:4). He also commanded regarding this by saying: [ And give them their compensation as an obligation] (An-Nisaa’ 4:24). The mahr is the sole right of the wife and no one may take any of it without her permission—not even her parents. The dower can be in the form of money, jewelry, clothing, or other material things. It can also be a non-material gift.

The Shari`ah has not specified any amount, but it should be in accordance with the husband’s financial ability and with what is reasonable for the bride in her social status. It is normally determined by agreement between the husband and the bride or her wali. A woman came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and offered herself to him. He declined, so a man who was present with him said, “O Messenger of Allah, marry her to me.” The Prophet asked him, “Do you have anything to give her?” He said, “No.” The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Give her at least an iron ring.” But he still could not afford it. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) then asked him, “Have you memorized any portion of the Qur’an?” He replied, “I have memorized such-and-such surahs.” The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) then said, “I marry her to you for the portion of the Qur’an that you have memorized.” This means that he was expected to teach her some of what he had memorized and to treat her kindly based on this memorization. All of that would be much more beneficial to the bride than lots of material gifts.

Know that the best dower is that which is light and easiest upon the husband. This is actually a sign of blessing for the bride, as the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Verily, a sign of blessing for a woman is that her engagement, dower, and giving birth are all made easy” (Ahmad, Al-Hakim, and others; its chain is good according to Al-Albani). `Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) once gave a sermon in which he said, “Do not be excessive in regard to the women’s dowers.” It is recommended to give the bride her dower immediately after executing the marriage contract. Yet it is a very common practice to divide the mahr into two portions, an advanced and postponed portion. It defeats the very purpose, which is to be a gift prior to having any intimacy with the bride.

Conditions
At the time of carrying out the marriage contract, the two parties may wish to set conditions whose violation would invalidate the contract. This is acceptable as long as the conditions do not violate any Islamic principles. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Every condition not according to the Book of Allah is void, even if it be a hundred conditions” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim). An example of a condition may be that a woman stipulates that she remain in a particular homeland during their marriage. The conditions are normally set by the wife’s side, because the husband can terminate the marriage by uttering the divorce.

Carrying Out the Contract:
It is recommended for the person conducting the marriage ceremony to start with a sermon, khutbat al-hajah, that was reported by Ibn Mas`ud and Jabir in At-Tabarani and by Al-Bukhari in At-Tarikh. The main and actual pillars of the contract are the offering and acceptance known as ijab and qabul. They signify the mutual agreement and acceptance between the two parties to join in this marriage bond. The ijab and qabul must be stated in clear, well-defined words, in one and the same sitting, and in the presence of the witnesses. The person conducting the ceremony may help the two parties say offering and accepting words. Documenting the marriage contract is not a requirement for the contract’s validty. However, it is important to document it for future reference and to preserve the rights of the husband and wife. Once the marriage contract is executed, all rights and responsibilities for the two parties become immediately due.

We ask Allah to bless us with beneficial knowledge and cure us from the ailment of ignorance and Allah knows best!

This week, BabaAli tackles the universal topic of Racism.  Being Muslim in South Africa, and being ‘Indian’ we get racism in two flavours.  One is the usual skin color (black, white, asian, etc)  and the other is amongst our own Indian culture.

The “caste” system, yes this is racism.  Yet many of our elderly folk practice this, dare i say, religiously!

I truly hope they get to see this video and realize their narrow minded view is keeping them and our Ummah in general backwards.

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