The fruits that were eaten by Sayyidina Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam are mentioned here. Seven ahaadith are mentioned in this chapter.

(188)  Hadith 1: Abdullah ibn Jaafar radiyallahu anhu says, “Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam ate Qith’thaa (cucumbers) with dates.”
Commentary:
Cucumber has a cold effect and dates have a hot one. By combining the two it becomes mild. From this hadith we gather that it is recommended that the effect (hot or cold) of things eaten should be taken into consideration. Cucumber is insipid and tasteless, and dates are sweet which results in the cucumber also tasting sweet.

(189)  Hadith 2 Aisha radiyallah anha reports that, “Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam ate watermelon with fresh dates.”
Commentary:
In Tirmidhi and other narrations, in explaining this, Sayyidina Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam also said, “The cold effect of one removes the heat of the other, and the heat of one removes the cold effect of the other.”

(190)  Hadith 3 Anas radiyallahu anhu says, “I saw Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam eat together musk-melon and dates.”
Commentary:
Some ulama have translated this also as watermelon’ instead of musk-melon, the reason being, as in the first narration, here also the cold effect is intended. But it is clear that musk-melon is meant here. The reason for eating dates is also that it gives the melon a
sweeter taste. It is not necessary that one’s benefit be gauged everywhere. It is possible that this is due to some other benefits. According to this humble servant the eating of watermelon with dates has its own benefit and that is to create evenness in the effect of both, so that it becomes mild. The eating of musk-melon with dates has its own benefit and that is that if the melon is insipid and tasteless, many a time, due to it being insipid sugar is mixed before it is eaten. Therefore it is not necessary to give the same reasons for both watermelon and musk-melon.

(191)  Hadith 4  Aisha radiyallahu anha says, “Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam ate watermelon with fresh dates.”

(192)  Hadith 5 Abu Hurairah radiyallahu anhu reports, “When the people saw (picked their) new fruit, they used to come and present it to Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam. Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam then recited this du’aa:-
Transliteration:
Allahumma baarik lana fi thimaa-rina wa-baarik lanaa
fi madinatinaa wa-baarik lanaa fi saa-’i-naa wa-fi
muddinaa-Allahumma-inna Ebraahima ‘ab-duka wa-kha-li-luka
wa-nabiy-yuka wa-inna ab-duka wa-nabiy-yuka wa-in-nahu da’aa-ka
li-makkata wa-inni ad’u-ka lil-madinati bi-mith-li maa da’aaka bihi
li-makkata wa-mith-lahu ma’a-hu

Translation: O Allah! Bless us in our fruits. Bless us in our city. Bless us in our Saa’, and bless us in our Mudd’ (these are two measures used in Madinah to measure dates, etc.). O Allah verily Ibrahim alaihis salaam is Your servant, friend and Nabi (since it was an occasion for humbleness Sayyidina Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam did not mention here his being the habib – beloved – of Alah.) And (whatever) he has supplicated to You for (colonising) Makkah. (Which is metioned in the aayah, “…so incline some hearts of
men that they may yearn towards them, and provide Thou them with fruits in order that they may be thankful.”- Surah Ibrahim, 37) I supplicate the same to You for Madinah.’ He then called a small child, to whom he gave that fruit.”

(193)  Hadith 6  Rubayyi bint Mu’awwidh ibn Afraa radiyallahu anha says, “My uncle Mu’aadh ibn Afraa sent me with a plate of fresh dates, which had small cucumbers on it, to Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam. Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam relished cucumbers. I took this to him. At that time some jewelery had been sent to Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam from Bahrain. He took a handful from it and gave it to me.”
Commentary:
Besides the previously metioned benefits of cucumbers and dates, it makes the body plump too. Sayyiditina Aisha radiyallahu anha relates that, “After my marriage, when the time came for me to go and live with Rasoolulla sallallahu alaihe wasallam, my mother thought I be a bit plump and my build become better. She gave me cucumbers and dates to eat. As a result my body became nice and plump.” It is related in a weak hadith that Sayyiditina Aisha radiyallahu anha said that Sayyidina Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam ate cucumber with salt. It is possible that he at times ate it with salt and at times with dates. Sometimes one prefers something that is sweet and at other times a thing that is salty.

(194)  Hadith 7 Rubayyi bint Mu’awwidh ibn Afraa radiyallahu anha said, “I took a plate of fresh dates and small cucumbers to Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam. He gave me a handful of jewelery, or a handful of gold.”
Commentary:
This is the same hadith mentioned above. Here it is mentioned briefly. The narrator doubts if it was jewelery or gold.

Shamaail Tirmidhi

Courtesy: www.everymuslim.net

What would you do if the world turns against you and difficulties become almost unbearable? Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) went through tremendous problems in the path of Islam.

It is related that when Abu Talib died, the Prophet (peace be upon him) went out on foot to Taif to call its people to Islam. They rejected his call, and he walked away until he got to the shade of a tree. So, he prayed two Rak’at and said:

“O Allah, I complain to You of my weakness and my insignificance in the eyes of the people. You are the most Merciful. No matter who You have put me at the mercy of – an enemy who will be stern with me, or a friend to look after my affairs – as long as You are not angry with me, then I don’t care. However, the relief You bring would be more comfortable for me. I seek refuge with Your Face – for which the darkness has lit up, and the affairs of this world and the next are organized – from being afflicted with Your Wrath or deserving of Your Anger. You have the right to admonish as You please, and there is no might nor power except by Allah.”

This was related by Al-Haythami in ‘Majma’ Az-Zawa’id’ (6/35), and he mentioned in it that Al-Tabarani related it in ‘Al-Mu’jam Al-Kabir’ on the authority of Abdullah Bin Ja’far Bin Abu Talib.

Look at how even in such moments of his life, all he cared about (peace be upon him) was whether or not Allah was pleased with him

“…The Prophet (pbuh) was the most generous person in giving away what he owned, and he would never look at something as being either too big or too insignificant to give up for the sake of Allah.

Nobody would ask him for anything except that he gave it to them, regardless of how big or small it was. He gave things away in a way that made it seem that he never feared poverty, and generosity and charity were the most beloved things to him. His happiness and joy in giving something away was more than that felt by those who would accept his gifts. He was the most generous person, and his generosity was like the blowing wind.

If a person in need would approach him, he would always prefer that person to himself. This was sometimes in the form of food, and was sometimes in the form of clothing.

He would have variety in terms of how he would give things away:

* Sometimes, he would give it as a small gift, sometimes as charity, and sometimes as a large gift.
* He would sometimes buy something from someone then give him back the product itself that he had just paid for, such as what he did with the camel he bought from Jabir.
* Sometimes, he would take a loan and then pay back more than he borrowed, or would give back something better or more plentiful than he borrowed.
* Sometimes, he would buy something and pay more than its value for it.
* He would accept a gift and then repay it with a gift many times more valuable.

This was all done out of his generosity and desire to practice as many types of charity and good as possible.

His charity was in what he possessed, his personality, and his words. He would give whatever he had and command others to give charity and encourage them in this and call to it through his actions and words.

If he saw a stingy person, his mere personality would force that person into being generous and charitable. Whoever interacted with him and accompanied him and observed his lifestyle had no choice but to also be generous and freely giving.

His lifestyle was one of kindness, charity, and goodness. This is why he was the most relaxed of people and the purest and softest of them in heart. Charity and kindness have an amazing effect in bringing about relaxation.

…Kindness to people and helping them through your money, influence, physical help, and other types of kindness is a means of relaxation. The generous and kind person is much more relaxed and purer and softer in heart, while the stingy person who displays no kindness has the tightest chest, the most depressed life, and the most worries and stress.

And the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) gave an example in the ‘Sahih’ regarding the generous and stingy. He likened them to two men wearing metal armor. Whenever the generous person intends to give something in charity, his armor widens and relaxes until it drags and covers his feet. Whenever the stingy person intends to give charity, every ring of his armor stays in place and doesn’t widen or relax at all. So, this is like the relaxation that the charitable believer feels compared to the tightness that the stingy person feels…”

[Zad al-Maad; 2/22-26]

The Messenger of Allah Muhammad (Peace be upon him) sermon on the Last Day of Shabaan

Salmaan (Radhiallaho Anhu) report On the last day of Shabaan Rasulullah (Sallallaho Alaihi Wasallam) addressed us and said: O people there comes over you now a great month, a most blessed month in which lies a night more greater in virtue than a thousand months.

It is a month in which Allah has made fasting compulsory by day and has made sunnah the Taraaweeh by night. Whosoever intends drawing near to Allah by performing any virtuous deed, for such person shall be the reward like the one who had performed a Fard[compulsory act] in any other time and whoever performs a Fard, shall be blessed with the reward of seventy faraaidh[compulsory acts] in any other time.

This is indeed the month of patience and the reward for true patience is Jannah (paradise). It is the month of sympathy with one’s fellowmen. It is the month wherein a true believer’s rizq[provisions] is increased.

Whosoever feeds another who fasted, in order to break the fast (at sunset), for the feeder there shall be forgiveness of sins and emancipation from the fire of Jahannam (hell) and for such feeder shall be the some reward as the one who fasted (who he fed) without that persons reward being decreased in the least.

Thereupon we said, ‘O messenger of Allah, not all of us possess the means whereby we can give a fasting person to break his fast’ Rasulullah (Sallallaho Alaihi Wasallam) replied Allah grants the same reward to the one who gives a fasting person to break the fast a mere date or a drink of water or a sip of milk.

This is a month, the first of which brings Allah’s mercy, the middle of which brings His forgiveness and the last of which brings emancipation from the fire of Jahannam.

Whosoever lessens the burden of his servants (bondsmen) in this month; Allah will forgive him and free him from the fire of Jahannam.

And in this month four things you should continue to perform in great number, two of which shall be to please your Lord, while the other two shall be those without which you cannot do. Those which shall be to please your Lord, are that you should in great quantity bear witness that there is no deity to worship except Allah (i.e. recite the Kalimah Tayibbah Laa Ilaaha illallah) and make much Istighfaar (beg Allah’s forgiveness with Astaghfirullah) and as for those without which you cannot do, you should beg of Allah entrance into paradise and ask refuge in Him from Jahannam.

And whoever gives a person water to drink, Allah

MY BELOVED PROPHET- Sallalahu Alaihi Wasallam.

There was a time in my youth,
When Islam was only a custom.
They said say there is no deity except God,..
And pray, youll go to Heaven.

Ah, how simple, no struggle in this,
Just a word, and simple act.
Thereafter Im absorbed in this world again,
With my assured place in Paradise intact.

But this was not to be my fate
For ALLAH chose to guide my heart.
I learnt of a man who struggled so hard
When his mission was from the start.

The story of someone who had morals,
Spoke gently, kindness he knew.
Never fearing to say whats right,
His conviction in ISLAM was true.

The touch of his hand was as soft as silk
To comfort a crying child.
To mend his clothes, or do the chores,
Never complaining, he always smiled.

His smell was always of musk,
And cleanliness he kept at his best.
Stark contrast with the heroes of today,
Who stink of beer and sweat.

He held the hands of his companions.
Unashamed to play with many children.
So modest, so humble, a perfect example,
That strangers could not recognise him.

His eyes slept little for nights were precious,
His prayers he treasured much greater.
To pray in the depths of night,
Seeking forgiveness, and nearness to his Creator.

He broke his tooth for me at Uhud,
And bled for me at Taif.
He cried for me, tears of concern,
Just so I could have this belief.

His enemies admired his teachings,
Uniting every religion, every clan.
Till ISLAM came to every corner of the world,
O, but indeed he was only a man.

To own a house, or build his wealth
Was not his main priority.
To establish ISLAM was more essential,
To bring us under a Higher Authority.

Dont you want him to plea for your case,
When before ALLAH-The Judge-you stand?
Dont you wish to be around his fountain,
A burning desire to drink from his hand?

So I love him more than all creation,
My Leader, my Humble Prophet.
Muhammad (SAWS) was a mercy to all mankind,
And to me, he is MY BELOVED

12 Foods of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)

1. Barley:
Food in fever, used in a soup form.

2. Dates
The Prophet(saw) said that a house without dates has no food. It should also be eaten at the time of childbirth.

3. Figs:
It is a fruit from paradise and a cure for piles.

4. Grapes:
The Prophet was very fond of grapes – it purifies the blood, provides vigour and health, strengthens the kidneys and clears the bowels.

5. Honey:
Considered the best remedy for diarrhoea when mixed in hot water. It is the food of foods, drink of drinks and drug of drugs. It is used for creating appetite, strengthening the stomach, eliminating phlegm; as a meat preservative, hair conditioner, eye soother and mouthwash. It is extremely beneficial in the morning in warm water.

6. Melon:
The Prophetsaid: None of your women who are pregnant and eat of water melon will fail to produce off spring that is good in countenance and good in character.

7. Milk:
The Prophet said that milk wipes away heat from the heart just as the finger wipes away sweat from the brow. It strengthens the back, improves the brain, renews vision and drives away forgetfulness.

8. Mushroom:
The Prophetsaid that mushroom is a good cure for the eyes; it also serves as a form of birth control and arrests paralysis.

9. Olive Oil:
Excellent treatment for skin and hair, delays old age, and treats inflammation of the stomach.

10. Pomegranate:
The Prophetsaid it cleanses you of Satan and evil aspirations for 40 days.

11. Vinegar:
A food Prophet Muhammadused to eat with olive oil. [Thats now a fashion in elite Italian Restaurants]

12. Water:
The Prophetsaid the best drink in this world is water, when you are thirsty drink it by sips and not gulps, gulping produces sickness of the liver.

So durood and praise be upon our beloved Prophet Hazrat Muhammadwho provided us with marvelous knowledge 14 centuries ago, which still dazzles the wisest minds today. May this information be beneficial to all of us.

pMADINAH-AL-MUNAWARRA, THE CITY OF THE PROPHET(SAW) , IS ABUZZ with rumors./p
pEver since the Muslims returned from the battle of Bani al-Mustaliq the hypocrites have been busy spreading lies against Aisha radi-Allahu anha. These stories have become the topic of every gathering, the subject of discussion in every household in Madinah. Though most of the sincere Muslims are confident in the innocence of Aisha radi-Allahu anha, they are still quiet, waiting for this to be ascertained by the Prophet (SAW). The Prophet (SAW) is also quiet, waiting for Allah to inspire him towards the truth. Thus, the hypocrites led by Abdullah bin Ubayy bin Salool have advantage over the seemingly confusing situation and gear all their energies in spreading the lies. Unsuspectingly influenced by the hypocrites rampage, a few Muslim thus begin to believe this false story. Some of these Muslims even actively help propagate it./p
pAmong them is Mistah bin Uthatha radi-Allahu anhu, a cousin of Abu Bakr radi-Allahu anhu. He is an extremely poor man with no money except that which Abu Bakr radi-Allahu anhu regularly gives him. Mistahs endorsement of the hypocrites story adds somewhat more weight to it, as he is a man with a fine reputation. It can be no longer said that belief in this story is limited to the circle of hypocrites./ppAnd so a trying and gruesome month passes before Allah subhanahu wa taala reveals the innocence of Aisha radi-Allahu anha. The Muslims finally exhale a sigh of relief and a sense of normalcy returns to Madinah./p
pHurt and angered by Mistahs previous allegations, Abu Bakr takes an oath that he will never spend on Mistah again. Considering Abu Bakrs perspective, this is a perfectly justifiable, even expected, position. Here is a person wholly dependant on Abu Bakr and yet is willfully spreading and endorsing wild, enormous rumors about Abu Bakrs beloved daughter. How else could Abu Bakr react in such an ironic situation? How else can he treat a person who slandered his daughter, the Mother of the Believers, with the worst of slander?/p
pAnd then Allah reveals: And let not those who are good and wealthy among you swear not to help their kinsmen, those in need and those who left their homes in Allahs Cause. Let them forgive and overlook. Do you not wish that Allah should forgive you? Verily! Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful. (24.22)/p
pAbu Bakr radi-Allahu anhu, despite his anguish and hurt feelings, immediately responds by exclaiming, By Allah, I would love it that Allah forgives me! He promptly returns to his previous habit, and swears that he will never cease spending on Mistah./p
pThis was the mercy and forgiveness the Quran teaches, the mercy and ties of kinship that Allah is pleased to see in His servants./p
pNow lets think … what would one of us do in the same situation? What would YOU do? Heres someone youve always helped, been good to; someone who absolutely depends on you. And now when youre going through some tough times yourself, that person, instead of being thankful for all what youve done and using this opportunity to make it up to you, gets up and stabs you in the back. Instead of telling the world of your goodness, goes on to spread tales. Would you go on enjoining ties of kinship?/p
pConflicts, trivial and great, arise between friends and families all the time. But the question is: how are we supposed to react in the face of such? Should we defend ourselves to the end because we are in the right? Should we refuse to forgive the other and overlook his/her faults, because we were wronged? Should we cut off relationships, shun one another due to a petty or even great argument? How can we let go of our ego and just forgive and overlook despite the great misdeed targeted against us?/p
pA glance at Abu Bakr radi-Allahu anhus life will tell us that no matter what the sin, no matter how grave the misdeed is, there should always remain a window leading to reconciliation and forgiveness. In the Quran we are time and time again reminded to forgive each other and live with each other in harmony and love. Regardless if the squabble is wholly the fault of the notorious other it is vital to realize that greatness is not in raising our head high and stomping off, rather it is in bending down and seeking to reconcile; in forgiving and overlooking. There is no attitude that can ever bring about the most reward and pleasure than that of unhesitant forgiveness. Being oft-forgiving is an attribute Allah uses to describe Himself, and indeed we should aspire to build this lofty description within us, even with our limited capabilities. We beg Allah to forgive our transgressions, our faults when we are entirely at fault; can we not forgive pettier mistakes directed at us!?/p
pThere will, of course, always be times when forgiving may seem the hardest pill to swallow. It may sometimes seem impossible to simply dispense with all the frustration and anger and move on. We may be more willing to move a mountain than forgive a person who has wronged us, to overlook his insults, to overcome our bad feelings. Abu Bakr, radi-Allahu anhu, despite being faced with attacks that were entirely unprovoked, did not hesitate to forgive once he was enlightened with the virtues of forgiveness. In his zeal, he produced the most sublime example of forgiving, in response to one of the most vicious attacks perpetrated./p
pAs differences and conflicts arise and pollute the atmosphere, there needs to be this window present to ventilate it. The window makes it possible to blow away the charged feelings and allow fresh air in ones life. It may be hard to open it and push it back along its rusty railings. But we must remember, that this very window is the same window which has been promised to lead to the forgiveness and mercy of Allah Himself./p

This reader submission comes from Abu Talha.

Maulood in Cairo, Egypt

Sing and praise the man who loves you, even now from his resting place, Oh believers and weep in humility for the man who shed copious tears for you, Oh faithful…Is this not the best way of celebrating the Prophet’s (saw) life, by emulating him, and treasuring him?

Whilst we are celebrating the beauty of this one life, let us not neglect or overlook the injustice, oppression and tyranny experienced by other lives, Let us remember them, and speak out against such despotism which allows and facilitates innocent blood to be spilt in such a sacred places.

In the Name of Allah, we invoke peace and blessings upon His Messenger.

Going back and thinking of the emotions felt over the last 25 days, one word which found a constant presence in our hearts was ‘helpless’ – the reality that we were helpless, and that we were silently witnessing a helpless people – our helpless people – trapped as Israeli killers patiently bombed them to bits while seated comfortably in the cockpits of American F-16s, as if to fulfill former IDF Chief of Staff Raphael Eitan’s April 1983 wish to see them “scurry around like drugged cockroaches in a bottle.”

The images of the charred bodies of infants, blood-soaked hijabs of sobbing mothers, mosques turned into rubble, stockpiles of food being fed to white phosphorous flames instead of the starving people they were meant for, fathers frantically and tearfully pulling corpses of family from the remains of bombed out homes – these images will forever remain in our conscience. From a material perspective, this was defeat and loss at its worst. What befell our brethren in Palestine has caused, and will continue to cause, much pain, anxiety, and sorrow in our hearts.

This reality mirrors one experienced by none other than the Messenger of Allah (??? ???? ???? ? ???) and his Companions 1,427 years ago following their military defeat at Uhud. When reviewing the events surrounding this defeat, one cannot help but be affected by the helplessness felt by the Muslims the moment they realized just how deep their material loss was in this battle, just as we are feeling at this moment when reflecting on what was taken from us as a result of the Israeli attack on Gaza. However, in reviewing these events, one can also not help but to take his feeling of helplessness and despair and transform it into firmness and strength.

First, let us examine the magnitude of the loss at Uhud.

Uhud affected the Muslims on many fronts. First of all, in what was possibly the most dangerous hour in the life of the Messenger of Allah, he found himself unprotected and exposed to the enemy on the battlefield, except for the presence of Talhah and Sa’d bin Abi Waqqas. This led to the disbelievers rushing to take advantage of the opportunity to inflict as much physical pain on him as they could, and they followed through by pelting him with stones (breaking his tooth and cutting his lip), cleaving his forehead, striking his shoulder with a sword, and striking him in the face so forcefully that his helmet pierced his cheek and caused a gaping wound. This audacity of the disbelievers so affected the Prophet that while wiping the blood from his face, he asked: “How can people who cut the face of their Prophet and break his incisor tooth – he who calls them to worship Allah – how can such people thrive or be successful?”

Imagine also the emotion felt by the Prophet and the Companions at the sight of Mus’ab bin ‘Umayr – who was personally appointed by the Prophet to bring Islam to Madinah in the first place – as both of his hands were amputated by the disbelievers in his attempt to secure the banner of the Muslims before they killed him. Picture in your mind the disbelievers mistaking the corpse of Mus’ab for the Prophet, yelling “Muhammad has been killed!” and sending a wave of disbelief through the Muslim ranks that demoralized many of them and caused them to give up the fight and turn back for Madinah.

Imagine the sadness that swept over the Companions as they assessed the aftermath of the battle to find the corpses of seventy of their brethren scattered around the battlefield, mutilated and disfigured by the spiteful disbelievers. Imagine then the shock and pain of the Prophet as he recognized the body of his beloved uncle, the Lion of Allah, Hamzah, as he lay among the casualties. Ibn Mas’ud said: “We have never seen the Messenger of Allah weeping so much as he was for Hamzah bin ‘Abd al-Muttalib.” To make matters worse, Hamzah’s burial was not quick and easy such that the Prophet could quickly put behind him the immense personal loss he had just experienced, as Khabbab bin al-Arrat said: “No shroud long enough was available for Hamzah except a white-darkish garment. When they covered his head with it, it was too short to cover his feet. Similarly, if they covered his feet, his head would be revealed.”

Imagine how the army returning to Madinah must have felt as they had to inform the family members of each of those seventy Companions killed that they would not be seeing their loved ones again in this life, one of whom was a woman who had lost her husband, father, and brother that day.

Imagine the dismay the Muslims must have felt that after their groundbreaking victory at Badr only a year earlier, they had now lost seventy of their brethren compared to the disbelievers’ casualties that amounted to only 22 men – less than a third of the Muslims’ losses. Such a loss would not only demoralize the Muslim army, but would also leave their military reputation, credibility, and dignity damaged in the eyes of the people.

All of this was the result of one single avoidable act of disobedience to the Prophet on the part of the archers stationed on the hill…all of this death, loss, sadness, and sorrow was easily avoidable had they simply obeyed a single command…

Undoubtedly, such circumstances would bring down any group and cause them immense pain, helplessness, and dismay. Undoubtedly, such circumstances would leave any group feeling that they had just experienced a loss from which they would not recover. However, the Prophet and his Companions were not just any group. They were a group who lived by the slogan {“And do not despair or be sad, as you are the most superior so long as you are believers.”} [Al ‘Imran; 139] They were a group who knew how to take advantage of their situation and hold their heads up high no matter what the odds were stacked against them, and no matter what their enemies did to intimidate them. They were a group who were able to emanate honor and power despite material loss.

Now, let us examine the attitude of the Muslims who had just experienced this loss firsthand.

When the disbelievers had completed their attacks and mutilation of the corpses of the Companions, Abu Sufyan scaled Mount Uhud looking for the Prophet, Abu Bakr, and ‘Umar. He called out to them and taunted them, but ‘Umar did not give the response of a defeated, dismayed, weak, and submissive victim. Rather he replied: “O enemy of Allah, those whom you have just mentioned, I tell you that they are still alive. Allah has maintained what you hate!”

Abu Sufyan replied: “The mutilation of your dead is something I did not order. However, it did not displease me. May Hubal be sublime!”

At the behest of the Prophet, ‘Umar replied: “Allah is more Sublime, Exalted, and Mightier!”

Abu Sufyan then shouted: “al-’Uzza is ours, and you have no ‘Uzza!”

‘Umar then made his famous statement: “Allah is our Helper, and you have no helper (???? ?????? ? ?? ???? ???)!”

Frustrated, Abu Sufyan muttered: “Today is revenge for Badr, as war is conducted with alternating successes.”

Unrelenting, ‘Umar yelled back: “No, we are not the same. Our dead are in Paradise, while your dead are in Hell!”

The honor, strength, and confidence with which ‘Umar stood up to the leader of the army that had just inflicted defeat upon his own speaks for itself. This shows that material victory or loss meant very little to these people compared to the true victory of the honor associated with being a believer. He was not intimidated or dismayed in the least despite directly conversing with the man whose happiness and joy was in seeing the Muslims tortured and eradicated, and despite the fact that this conversation was taking place directly on the heels of the first military defeat ever experienced by the Muslims.

This shows that no matter how demoralizing a loss may be for you, the Muslim – no matter how many mosques are bombed to rubble, how many children are made into orphans or are themselves burned to a crisp by white phosphorous bombs, how distressing it is that even basic food and medicine are held back from our brothers and sisters by those who have no regard for human life – no matter how cruel a hand you as a Muslim are dealt, you always keeps your head up, your boldness intact, and put aside your anxiety and dismay.

Then came Hamra’ al-Asad.

While the disbelievers were still on their way back to Makkah, the Muslims had arrived back in Madinah in a state of exhaustion, pain, and sorrow. They were also in a state of alert, as they were expecting the disbelievers to turn back and attempt to invade Madinah in light of the perceived weakness of the Muslim army.

However, none of these hindrances prevented the Prophet from what he was about to do next: he went around and gathered all of the injured Muslims who had fought at Uhud the day before in order to lead them in pursuit of the army that had just defeated them. Many fresh, uninjured fighters were available and desperate to join, such as ‘Abdullah bin Ubayy and Jabir bin ‘Abdillah. However, the Prophet only wanted those injured and exhausted soldiers who were still recovering from their wounds to join him. This was unheard of: an army composed exclusively of crippled fighters who had just experienced a major military defeat?!

With the Prophet still recovering from his own wounds, they marched to an area outside of Madinah called Hamra’ al-Asad, only to receive word that their assumptions were true – the disbelievers had turned back and considered attacking Madinah. They still haven’t recovered from Uhud, and they now have to defend Madinah against the same enemy? However, the Prophet’s ability to take advantage of the situation was now going to reverse the psychological loss the Muslims had suffered at Uhud.

He sent a messenger to relay to Abu Sufyan and his troops that the Muslims had regrouped, recovered, and were hot on their heels. Abu Sufyan could not believe his ears, and the anxiety and panic that had gripped the Muslims only the day before was now spread among his own troops. He then decided that it was in his best interests to retreat to Makkah and cancel his plan to attack Madinah. However, in an attempt to frighten and intimidate the Muslims from pursuing him, Abu Sufyan sent a message back to the Muslims that he had gathered the ranks of all the Makkans to lay waste to the Prophet and his army: {“Those to whom the people said: “Verily, the people have gathered against you a great army. So, fear them.””} [Al ‘Imran; 173] What was the response of the injured Prophet and his small group of crippled fighters to this threat from the man who had just dealt them defeat the day before? {“…But it only increased them in faith, and they said: “Allah is sufficient for us, and He is the best disposer of affairs.””} [Al ‘Imran; 173] And the injured Prophet stayed at Hamra’ al-Asad with his crippled group, waiting for three whole days to confront this great army that Abu Sufyan had supposedly gathered against them. In the end, when it became clear that Abu Sufyan and the disbelievers were simply bluffing and were too afraid to pull through with their threats, he decided to turn back and return to Madinah. Would anyone have expected the disbelievers to act so cowardly only a day after Uhud?

Reflect on how the Prophet was able to so effectively reverse the devastation of Uhud in just a matter of days:

* He revived the morale of the crippled Muslims who had just experienced loss and defeat by insisting that they be the ones to accompany him in pursuit of the very enemy that had just defeated them.

* He decreased the morale of the disbelievers who had just experienced victory by showing them that no matter how devastating a blow the Muslim is dealt, he still has his honor, bravery, and the will to face those who challenge him.

* He restored the military reputation and power of the Muslims that had temporarily suffered as a result of the events at Uhud.

The effectiveness of the Prophet as a leader in times of crisis cannot be overstated. It is often said that a person can be judged by how he handles crisis and disaster, as anyone can be calm and composed in times of ease. This concept can be applied to groups and nations as well as individuals. Therefore, this episode in the Sirah teaches us that even at the worst times and in the midst of the most depressing crises, it is possible to reverse the loss, psychologically if not materially. All it takes is a sharp mind to observe the situation and see what holes in the wall there are from which one may take advantage and turn the tables to be in his favor, thus turning defeat into victory.

Let us now examine the bounty Allah granted the Muslims as a result of the attitude they showed in the face of loss and defeat.

It should be noted that even after the events of Hamra’ al-Asad, the Muslims were once again dealt tragic losses at ar-Raji’ (where a group of Muslims were betrayed and captured, leading to the famous crucifixion of Khubayb in Makkah) and the Well of Ma’unah (where, in a painful repeat of Uhud, seventy more of the best Companions were killed, this time as the result of betrayal). Victory is not a stagnant condition that remains once it is achieved. Rather, Allah gives and takes it even from the best of people (??? ???? ???? ? ???), and He intertwines it with loss and defeat in order to see how we will deal with each of the respective situations.

The Muslims whose act of disobedience to the Prophet was the single precursor to the devastating loss at Uhud undoubtedly learned their lesson and repented for their error. As a result, when the Prophet laid siege to the fortresses of Banu an-Nathir only a few months later, the Muslims were able to achieve victory without any fighting even occurring. Allah had directly used the weapon of fear and intimidation by placing these into the hearts of Banu an-Nathir, as He Said: {“…and He cast terror into their hearts, so that they destroyed their own dwellings with their own hands and the hands of the believers…”} [al-Hashr; 2] The same blessing was granted to them by Allah only a few months later when the second battle at Badr took place, with the Muslims waiting eight whole days for Abu Sufyan and his army to show up while he meanwhile had decided to return to Makkah instead of taking his chances in facing the Prophet and his Companions. Such blessings were partly the result of the Muslims learning from their mistakes at Uhud and reviewing what it was they had done to contribute to the loss and defeat that had affected the Ummah as a whole. Their unconditional obedience to the Prophet in going out to Hamra’ al-Asad despite their crippled state, as well as the faith, certainty, and bravery they displayed even when threatened by Abu Sufyan’s army, were among the many reasons for the swift victories at Banu an-Nathir and the second Badr.

Similarly, it is upon us to examine ourselves as individuals and groups and see if we are reacting to the devastation and loss experienced in Gaza in the proper way and with the proper attitude. The bravery of the Prophet at Hamra’ al-Asad, the post-defeat boldness of ‘Umar while speaking down to Abu Sufyan, the cleverness of Khalid bin al-Walid in reversing the flanks in the face of an imminent loss at Mu’tah – these should all serve to strengthen us and teach us that despair, pain, anxiety, and victimization should not be in the dictionary of the Muslim. Rather, we should always maintain our honor and confidence following defeat, keep our heads raised high in the face of loss, and face those who continue to challenge us in a bold, smart, and effective way.

{“And do not despair or be sad, as you are the most superior so long as you are believers. If a disaster befalls you, be sure that a disaster has likewise befallen them. And such are the days, we rotate them between the people…”}

Source: http://iskandrani.wordpress.com/2009/01/21/after-gaza-how-the-prophet-coped-with-loss/

Alot of these are pretty general knowledge and sound somewhat obvious and mundane. However, many a time we get so caught up in the daily grind of work & chores, we sometimes forget about the essence of marriage, Love.

Many non muslims have this habit of accusing Muslim men of oppressing women, one has to simply read our hadith & lifestyle of our Prophet Mohammed (Pbuh) to realise how high we raise our women!
1. Dress up well for one’s wife:
Dress up for your wife, look clean and smell good.When was the last time us men looked good to please our wives.Just like the husband wants his wife to look nice for him, she also wants her husband to dress up for her too. Remember that Rasullullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) – would always start with Miswak when returning home and always loved the sweetest smells.

2. Use likeable names for your wife:
Use the cutest names for your wife. Rasul Allah – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam – had nicknames for his wives, ones that they loved.Call your wife by the most beloved names to her, and avoid using names that hurt their feelings.

3. Recognize the good & focus on that:
Don’t treat her like a fly. We never think about a fly in our daily lives until it ‘bugs’ us. Similarly, a wife will do well all day – which brings no attention from the husband – until she does something to ‘bug’ him. Don’t treat her like this; recognize all the good that she does and focus on that.

4. Be silent on the wrongs:
If you see wrong from your wife, try being silent and do not comment! This is one of the ways Rasullullah(sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) – used when he would see something inappropriate from his wives – radi Allahu ‘anhum. It’s a technique that few Muslim men have mastered.

5. Smile at your wife:
Smile at your wife whenever you see her and embrace her often. Smiling is Sadaqah and your wife is not exempt from the Muslim Ummah. Imagine life with her constantly seeing you smiling. Remember also those Ahadith when Rasullullah(sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam)- would kiss his wife before leaving for Salah, even if he was fasting.

6. Thank her:
Thank her for all that she does for you. Then thank her again! Take for example a dinner at your house. She makes the food, cleans the home, and a dozen other tasks to prepare. And sometimes the only acknowledgement she receives is that there needed to be more salt in the soup. Don’t let that be; thank her!

7. Make her happy:
Ask her to write down the last ten things you did for her that made her happy. Then go and do them again. It may be hard to recognize what gives your wife pleasure. You don’t have to play a guessing game, ask her and work on repeating those times in your Life.

8. Comfort her:
Don’t be-little her desires. Comfort her. Sometimes the men may look down upon the requests of their wives.Rasullullah(sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) set the example for us in an incident when Safiyyah – radi Allahu ‘anha – was crying because, as she said, he had put her on a slow camel. He wiped her tears, comforted her, and brought her the camel.

9. Be humorous:
Be humorous and Play games with your wife. Look at how Rasul Allah – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam – would race his wife Aisha -radi Allahu ‘anha – in the desert. When was the last time we did something like that?

10. Try to be the Best:
Always remember the words of Allah’s Messenger – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam: “The best of you are those who treat their families the best. And I am the best amongst you to my family.” Try to be the best!

In conclusion: Never forget to make Dua to Allah – azza wa jall – to make your marriage successful. And Allah ta’ala knows best !!

Courtesy: www.everymuslim.net